You Ain’t Got To Lie Craig; A Letter to the Fellas Who Can’t Be Faithful And Don’t Want a Relationship

Attention Fellas!!!! If you want to just have sex with a woman; then say so.  If you don’t want a relationship just say that.  If you are a married man; tell the truth. Yes, many women will walk away from the proposal, but there will be some that won’t. Too many times men make situations difficult for themselves and the women they are involved with.  You would be surprised at what some women would actually put up with.  Yes, fellas, there are women out there that don’t mind messing with you if you have a wife or girlfriend.  There are some who just want to get their back arched from time to time. Stop making the game so hard.  Grow up for once and say what you really want or intend to do!!! Did it cross your mind just once that maybe she just wanted to fuck too and not build a relationship?

Another question I want you to ponder on… Why get married under false pretenses? Why not let your soon-to-be wife know that you have an issue with being faithful?  Hell, you might be surprised how she just may let you cheat in private.  If not, o-well. Let her go. She isn’t for you and what you are trying to achieve in your lifestyle.  Stop being so selfish and self-centered. Sounds easy, doesn’t it? But I am pretty sure you don’t want to do that because you don’t want anyone else to have her.  That’s not fair!!! Let her have some freedom to do what she wants too!!!

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Listen, fellas, you can save yourself a lot of stress if you would just be honest from the start. It is that easy.  I know married/committed men out there that have stressful separate lives because they started out with a lie.  They went out looking for other women without wearing their wedding bands just to catch their victims.  Or, they used the infamous line, “I’m separated or in a separate part of the house.” Some men even make up bullshit stories that make their marriage seem so unhappy and unhealthy just so they can look like the victim.  I know one guy who uses the story that his wife has cancer so that is why he hasn’t left.  She’s been in remission for 10 years!!! You don’t have to do all of that.  Keep the ring on and deal with the woman who is willing to be your side chic instead of playing games with women who thought you were single or about to get a divorce any day now.  Why put good women thru heartbreak and wishful thinking?  Why live double lives with various women when you can have an open and honest situation?

Most of the time relationships go south because of a lie that never needed to be told.  Instead of trying to get a good woman to play in your games; settle for the ones that are all for the side piece and sex when you want it.  Why not find someone who is into open relationships? Why have your significant other believe in a fairy tale that isn’t real?  Why even get into a relationship at all?  You see you want to have your cake and eat it too.  You want to have a committed relationship with someone who will not cheat or lie to you but will be willing to allow you to cheat and lie to her.  You want someone who will remain loyal even when you get caught screwing up but will be cool with you continuing your behavior. Does that make sense? Be honest. It doesn’t, but I promise there are women out there that fit those criteria. I have proof it exists.

I would never forget having a conversation with this married woman who doesn’t care for me too tough because of how her husband and his friends portrayed me and the rest of my associates because of how they were living there adulterous lifestyle.  (side note: You know how some of you guys have to make up lies to keep your wife/girlfriend off your backs. But then again, he had to cover up for the rest of the fellas).  She stated, ” I will leave my husband when I am ready.  I guess she (the side chic) can see who will outlast who first.  I ain’t going nowhere.  He ain’t going nowhere. That’s my husband. We can do this until I get tired and ready to leave, but until then she can continue to be a good side chic”.  At that point, I was wondering to myself, why is he continuing with the lies? She ain’t going anywhere.  Why won’t she just let him cheat in peace and stay out his phone and social media?  Hell, he’s been cheating the entire marriage for crying out loud!!! Why can’t he just keep it one hundred because no matter how many women he is with; she ain’t going nowhere.  He has it good and doesn’t even know it!!! So you see, there are women out there that are willing participants!!

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Now I can’t promise you that you won’t have any drama even when you are honest about your intentions because sometimes feelings can get involved on either side. But remember as long as you all continue to have open and honest communication, you can figure out how to work thru those issues like adults.  If the situation changes, then be honest with her.  If you want a relationship with her, then let her know.  She may not be dating anyone special that would hinder that notion. Then again, she may not even like you that way, to begin with, and like the relationship the way it is (strictly sex without a commitment). There are some women out there that can control their emotions and not get attached. There are also some women that cannot control their emotions and will become attached especially if she has been rocking with you for years.  But remember, because you were upfront and honest the entire time; you are not responsible for how it turns out on her end!!!

Being brutally honest or keeping it one hundred is not a bad thing.  Stop being scared and tell the truth when you decide to get into a certain type of relationships with women. It may seem cruel, not the norm, shun upon, or considered a sin to most, but at least you were honest from the start and throughout the relationship.  You can save yourself a lot of problems if you would just be honest. If you have been lying to your significant other(s), think about telling them the truth today.  Yes, they are going to cry, break down, be hurt, and won’t trust you, but you can set the tone in the relationship from this day forward.  You can give them the ultimatum to either roll with it or leave.  Most of the time the woman won’t leave anyway because of time and feelings.  You will be surprised at how some woman say they would leave, wouldn’t.  Try it out and see how it works for you.  I know you won’t because you don’t want to risk it.  I mean do you really deserve a good woman anyway? 

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